Between bad events and the plethora of bad news that’s been surfacing lately I haven’t had the time nor the will to bother with ye ole blog. Now that it’s Sunday and I’m trying to enjoy my solitude, I thought I’d kick things off with some lofty attempts to laugh.

Hanzi Smatter?? This site is awesome because it exploits my favorite pet peeve of people who get tattoos of Chinese characters but neither know a lick about China, its culture, or its language. Their tattoo is picked straight off the wall with a very rough translation of the character and as a result they are permanently inked with words that aren’t exactly what the artist in the shop told them it was. The translation for the picture shown above is: “Exile Husband Retrievable Arrow with a String Attached to It”. Haha.

Scariest Costumes from 2004 - A little belated but damn hilarious. Pictures include. A snippet from the site: “Transform Daddy’s little girl into America’s NEW favorite bad girl, Private First Class Lyndie England. For the costume, simply add an invisible-dog leash from a novelty shop to a pair of camouflage pants and a khaki-colored shirt from your local Army/Navy surplus store. (Candy cigarette optional.)”

21 Rationales for War There’s really more than 21 but here’s the short version of what they said and who said them. Hm, maybe this isn’t really funny at all.

JFK Reloaded -Believe in the Single (magic) Bullet Theory? Aside from being a game, if you can match and identical shot Warren Commission style you can win $100,000. Of course, you have to pay to play. Considering the conditions, I think the site owner will get $100,000 before any one comes close to a match.

Evil Care Bears - Forget the “care bear stare” these guys are armed with guns.

X-Men VS. Street Fighter - Shockwave with multiuser. Best Ever.

I’m so bored right now, I thought that I would share some of the sites that I have recently stumbled upon.

The Amazing Morphing Michael Jackson - A nice video clip of Michael Jackson through the years, because you can’t get enough of Michael’s disintegrating face.

Koogle.com - Google, Kosher style. Oy Vey.

Barbwire Jump - A bloody fun game where you jump barbwire instead of jumprope.

Peanut - 3 squirrels challenge you to a game of table nutball - go flick them nuts!!

Stress Relief Paintball - Stalk office to office armed with your paint gun, shooting stress relief balls.

Acno’s Energizer - I’ve been engrossed in this game since I pressed start. It has about thirty levels and I will beat every last one of them.

Beat up Jar Jar Binks - Three words for why Episode One sucked: Jar Jar Binks.

AMBUSHED: Han Solo’s Journey Home to Corellia - The Millennium Falcon is attacked by a fleet of Imperial TIE-Fighters, shoot and destroy.

The Battle of Yavin - Flight sim.

Spy Hunter! - I’m still easily consumed by this game.

Q-Bert - The only thing I can say about Q-Bert is, that to this day, it’s still one of the only games that can easily piss me off every time I play it because our joystick sticks. BAH!

Robotron - It’s Robotron, enough said.

And of course, you can always play Pacman here.

Junkbot - Thanks to Benny I’ve been wasting my time online playing this cute lego game.

The New York Defender - Another bizarre flash game. In this one you shoot the airplanes before they crash into the World Trade Center. It makes a nice companion to that Suicide Bomber game.

Deportation: The Game - Rated JR, for Janet Reno. Catch an illegal alien, brainwash him, send him to America, raid him, then send him back home, USA style.

Micro Scooter Death - Throw bricks at people on micro scooters.

Survivor Fishing- Aye mates, this is a sweet fishing game based on the TV show “Survivor”.

The Simpsons in Flash- Explore the Simpson’s house. Nice details.

Boardin’ - Skateboarding game. Personally, I prefer Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater.

Iron Mike & Leisure Suit Harry - Tritonweb made flash remakes of two classic games, Nintendo’s Mike Tyson’s Punch Out and a spinoff of Leisure Suit Larry.

How lame is your page? - Find out how lame your webpage is at Xpenguin. I’m neutral- hey, that’s better than lame.